I was speaking to a parent this past week who was feeling awful for not having listened to her child.
You see, her child had been bullied for a while. She thought that her incidents were not that bad. Then, months later she found out that her child was experiencing extreme symptoms from her bullying experiences.
Her child was having panic attacks, couldn’t sleep, and got physically sick often. Her child kept asking to stay home and then one day, her child just refused to go to school.
After long talks and some therapy sessions, this mom found out that the bullying experiences had been very consistent over the course of a year. Furthermore, she found out that teachers had been part of the bullying as well.
Sadly, this happens. That’s why it’s important for parents to ask as many questions as possible to find out what kids are...
It’s been a heavy week, hasn’t it?
There were several shootings this week, but the one that’s been highlighted the most is the one in Uvalde, Texas.
I have to be honest. I have been avoiding reading or listening to a lot of it because my emotional bandwidth just can’t take it right now. That doesn’t mean I don’t care. I certainly do. But, I have to limit my consumption of things that I am aware will be too much to handle at the time.
One thing I've had to do regardless of how I feel is to check in with my kids to find out how they're doing. I know that the answers might not be ideal. I don’t expect them to feel like the world is an amazing place and that they will feel 100 percent safe and secure.
But, I want to make sure that they know I am there for them and that they can ask me any questions.
That’s the job of a parent, right? No matter what is going on, we never stop being there for our kids.
So, I want...
I try to be as involved as possible in my children’s lives. I do not accept short answers when I ask them how their day has gone. I try to have conversations with them to know what’s really been going on in their lives, but it's not always so easy.
They are in their teens and sometimes, sharing about their lives is NOT something they're interested in doing.
Try A Different Approach
Since kids can be really stubborn about opening up, I've had to learn when to leave them alone and when to get them to engage without them realizing that they're doing it.
It has to be subtle and all about them!
For example, this morning, my younger child was very cranky and didn't want to talk. As I drove her to school, I asked her if she knew what was making her feel cranky. Of course, she gave me the usual teen answer, "I dunno".
Since I didn't want her to go off to school feeling down, I started telling her that I imagine that if her favorite stuffed animal...
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I was speaking to someone who just moved to the United States about what to expect from the public school system.
It was insightful to learn that while this person had visited the United States a lot over the past 10-years and even attended university in the states, their idea of how schools are run and parents' role in the way things are done at schools was surprising to her.
Overall, she was impressed that while parents have a lot of power in telling the schools what they like or don't like, they mostly DON'T exercise that right.
This conversation made me realize that the reason so many parents don't get involved in decision-making processes at their children's schools is not that they do not care. It's because of a lack of knowledge.
So, I decided to share a few things you should know if you would like to take more control of your child's education in public or private schools.
Parents and community members can request the minutes of the Parent-Teacher Association...
Some parents do what they think will help stop it, not realizing their actions can make the situation worse.
That’s what happened to a mother who decided to directly speak to her child’s bully.
Perhaps she wasn’t aware that boarding a school bus was considered trespassing. That’s reason enough for her to be arrested or fined (depending on the state laws).
But this mother went further. She began verbally assaulting the 11-year old child and she ended up fighting the child (physical assault).
The whole thing was caught on video. But, let’s assume the child hit her first. As an adult, what are the chances that the justice system will side with the mother?
You see, I have read many news articles about similar situations because, in my opinion, parents are not well aware of efficient ways to manage bullying situations involving their children and schools are not taking bullying complaints seriously enough.
This is why...
When I tell people that I’m a parenting coach who specializes in anti-bullying education, people ask “what does an anti-bullying coach do??” and “Oh, that’s a thing now?”
Yes, LOL! It’s a thing. I’ve been doing this work for five years so far and I LOVE IT!
I decided to help parents in their journey because parenting hasn’t been so easy for me and I know that I’m not alone. Like many parents, I have had moments when I needed to ask questions but I felt that I couldn’t go to a friend or family member for an honest, unbiased answer or criticism of my kids or my husband and I’s parenting skills.
There’s still a lot of stigma in society about parents reaching out for help. It doesn’t make sense to me because we get help for everything else in life, so, why would parenting be any different?
There are also lots of advantages to going to a parenting coach.
Coaches are people who give...
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Since many schools throughout the nation are returning to online learning, more kids will be tempted to navigate to their social media sites.
And, let's be honest, they're already spending more time than any parent would want online, right?
So, let’s talk about SOCIAL MEDIA ETIQUETTE.
If you’ve been following me for a while, you’ve already read or heard me talk about delaying the use of smart devices for kids until you can no longer hold back.
You’ve also read or heard me talk about things to consider agreeing on with your kids when YOU DO give them access to devices and the internet.
Now, let’s review a few details about online etiquette:
1 Never share or repost information that you have not confirmed. You can avoid arguments with friends and family if you follow this suggestion.
2 NEVER share or post mean comments, images, or videos about someone (even if they are notorious for being a bully)
3 ...
A lady recently asked me if I could help her find a lawyer to help her niece with a bullying situation at school.
You see, her niece was physically bullied and has been at home this week due to fear of lack of safety because the school hasn’t responded to the bullying report at all!
So, I don’t blame this high school child. If a school has allowed over two weeks to pass and not one person has responded, then I too wouldn’t go back to school without knowing they would do their best to keep me safe.
Did you know that legally, the number one mission for all schools in the U.S. is to keep kids safe while on campus?
Yup.
Providing academic education comes second.
So, back to this lady’s question. She wanted to know what type of lawyer should she look for and how would she be able to find a good one?
Fortunately, I’ve done my homework regarding this question and had the privilege of interviewing some lawyers who have defended children...
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Most kids NEVER tell an adult that they're being bullied because they try to handle the situation alone or they fear that telling an adult might make matters worse.
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